Born to Stand Out by Victoria

Born to Stand Out by Victoria - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

If I could give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be to stop shrinking yourself to fit in. I’ve spent most of my life thinking that blending in was the only way I could be accepted. From childhood through my teenage years, I often held back my ideas, hid my personality, and even my goals, just to avoid standing out and being thought of as “the weird one.” I thought that being accepted by others meant that I needed to act more like them: less loud, less bold, less me. For 17 out of my 23 years, I convinced myself that being different would only lead to rejection.

Looking back, I wish I had realized sooner that shrinking myself didn’t make me more lovable. I can still remember times in school when I knew the answer but didn’t raise my hand, or when I had a unique idea but kept quiet because it didn’t match with everyone else’s. Even when it came to dreaming big, I stayed silent. I just wanted to fit into the spaces around me, even if that meant leaving my true self behind.

If I could sit down with my younger self, I would tell her that she is allowed to take up space and she is allowed to be different. She doesn’t have to change who she is just to be accepted by people who were never meant to be in her life in the first place.

It took me a long time to unlearn the idea that I needed to “fit in” to be worthy. But once I stopped trying to blend in, things started to change. I gained confidence, and I started speaking up. I surrounded myself with people who celebrated me instead of tolerating my existence. That shift in my mindset didn’t just improve my relationships. It changed my life. I stopped choosing the easy path and started doing things and chasing the goals that truly excite me, whether that’s pursuing a future in wildlife biology or being interested in culinary school. I now make choices based on what I want and not what others expect. And I can say with confidence that I’ve never felt more sure of who I am and where I’m going.

So, if I could offer one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: stop trying to fit into places that weren’t made for you to be in. You were never meant to be small. Be as bold as you want to be. Be as honest as you want to be. Be the best you that you possibly can be. The moment you stop hiding is the moment your life truly begins.