The Thief of Joy by Rhema

The Thief of Joy by Rhema - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

If I could give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: “Comparison is the thief of joy. It catches you when you least expect it and slowly steals your confidence, leaving you breathless and alone. DO NOT LET IT WIN.”

As a child, I was unapologetically myself. A ray of sunshine, a burst of energy, completely content with who I was. I danced when I felt like dancing, spoke and created freely, and boldly took up space. I had so many dreams and aspirations. My imagination was my best friend.
However, as I grew older, Comparison slowly crept its way in. At first, it was harmless—someone received a better grade than I did, and I used it as motivation. Then, it became constant. I began to wonder if I was just not as smart or capable.
Suddenly, I doubted everything that made me special. When someone else’s idea was chosen over mine, I questioned if my creativity was good enough. I began comparing my light to the light of others, unsatisfied with everything I did. I searched for validation from anyone willing to give it to me, and instead of standing in the purpose deep down I knew I had, I stood in the way.

In my head, my thoughts grew louder: “Someone else is doing it better.”
“I am not doing enough.”
“Maybe it was a dumb idea.”
“It was a failure from the start.”
“Maybe I should give up.”

That internal war became a weight I carried every day. I learned how to mask it—showing enough of myself so no one questioned if I was okay but not enough to be the light that I was. I overthought everything, did the bare minimum with every project I was given, and shrunk back from opportunities I once would have taken with enthusiasm. I did not trust my voice. The joy that came so easily to me was now so hard to reach. I was trying to be someone else—in my mind, being me was not enough.

Comparison—the thief of joy—almost silenced my voice and stole my happiness.
If my younger self had known how toxic and dangerous those thoughts could become, she would have fought a little stronger, pushed a little harder, and stood a little taller. Unfortunately, for a while, Comparison won until I was reminded of my unique spark. What made me, me. I was reminded never to dim my light just because someone else is shining, to be that little girl with dreams, goals, and brilliant creative ideas, the little girl who believed she could do anything she put her mind to, the little girl who walked into a room with a big, bright smile on her face.

I would tell that little girl this:
“You are unique and different! You are a light! Be that light! Do not let what anyone else is doing affect how you move forward. Do not let Comparison distract you from your purpose. Stand tall in who you are, and TAKE UP SPACE. Be the content, joyful little girl you are, the little girl who is eager to see how far she can go.”

There was a turning point for me—a moment where I realized I had to reclaim my voice—my spark; and that’s what I did. I became tired of trying to fit into other people’s narrative of me and took pleasure in knowing that I was me and not anyone else. I promised myself I would never let anyone make me feel like I was not enough just the way I was—not even me. Slowly, I became me again, speaking and creating freely. Now, when Comparison tries to creep its way back in—and it still does—I know better than to give in. I remind myself the world does not have two of a person. I was never meant to be a copy but to be one of a kind.

TO YOUNGER, PRESENT, AND FUTURE: You cannot let comparison win. Fight stronger, push harder, stand taller. Be ALL of YOU.
TO COMPARISON: You’ve been caught. You don’t get to win anymore.