Breathe, and Give Yourself Grace by Aviyana

Breathe, and Give Yourself Grace by Aviyana - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

If I could offer just one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: Be patient and give yourself grace. Growth takes time, and you're doing the best you can. Like many others, I spend a lot of time comparing my progress to that of others, and it has left me feeling discouraged if my path is not as smooth as theirs or if I am not hitting the same milestones. I would often question my abilities and my worth because I thought I "should" have been doing this or I "should" have already made it so far. I saw other people achieving milestones that I had set for myself, but I was not hitting them myself at the same time. I began to think that I was falling behind or less than them. I did not understand that everyone's timing is different and that life doesn't have to be a race. It is a journey that everyone must undertake at their own pace.
Looking back on my high school years and my first year in college, I put an extreme amount of pressure on myself to have everything figured out as quickly as I could. I had to discover my purpose in life and the major I wanted, make absolutely no mistakes and be confident with every decision I made. But that is not how growth works. Growth is messy; there are ups and downs, curves, detours, trials, and errors. There is no one right path that someone must follow, and I had to learn to be okay with that.
If I had been more patient with myself in the past, I could have appreciated how far I pressed at the time instead of fixating on what I thought I was lacking. I could acknowledge the effort that I put forth without minimizing the results. I would better understand that mistakes are not bad but rather something I can learn and grow from. It is proof that I am trying, learning, and becoming better.
This patience would have allowed me to be kinder to myself. I was always told that I am my own harshest critic. I hold myself to such impossible standards that when I do not meet them, I beat myself up over it. If I took the time actually to look back and reflect on my growth, I could see how far I have come rather than how much further I need to go. This would also keep me more motivated and hopeful for all my future endeavors.
I chose this advice because patience is the best foundation for resilience and growth. It allows you to overcome setbacks without giving up and to show up for yourself, even when your growth may seem slow. It serves as a reminder that you and everything you do are a work in progress, and you should take pride in that. So, to my past self: Take a deep breath, trust yourself, give yourself some grace, and trust the woman you are becoming.