Learning to Be Uncomfortable by Saimen

Learning to Be Uncomfortable by Saimen - January 2026 Scholarship Essay

In 6th grade, I decided to make my own video game using a game engine called Roblox Studio. It was the start of the COVID lockdown, and I played many video games, developing an interest in how they were created. What most captivated me about the process was the programming. I didn’t understand it at first, so I watched YouTube videos on how to create scripts that awarded achievements or moved cameras in a cutscene. Eventually, I just read the documentation for the engine’s coding language, Lua. I coded game mechanics, and if an error appeared, I Googled it and solved the issue myself. At some point in the process, I realized teaching myself the content this way, despite being significantly more difficult, was more efficient than waiting to be taught it by others. I continued coding, and as I self-taught myself, became advanced enough to make highly technical things, such as datastores. I even went on to learn more languages like Python.

My love for programming itself stems from my love of math. Both require problem-solving, which is the connecting aspect I seem to enjoy. It was in 8th grade, when we started delving into basic Algebra, that I found I really loved the problem-solving aspects. I always try to learn new math, so I occasionally ask my math teachers about concepts beyond our lessons. I wanted to get ahead in math classes, so last summer I enrolled in Calculus 1 at Grossmont College. The course was accelerated–only 6 weeks long–so each week was full of new math to learn. At first, I felt really out of place in a class with college-aged people. I was one of the only high-school-aged kids there. When we worked in groups, though, I realized that everyone was struggling to learn the same things, just like me. As we worked on problems together, I started to feel I belonged. Working in groups also helped me understand the material better. I ended the class strongly, went on to take Calculus 2, and will soon start Calculus 3 at the same college. I realized that being challenged helped me get used to my new, uncomfortable situation. Once I got past that uncomfortableness, I was able to thrive.

Through programming and math, I realized something important: my strength is persistence. I am able to be uncomfortable, do difficult things, and persevere until I understand. I also found that to learn difficult concepts, I couldn’t wait for others to give me the answers. Rather, I had to apply myself and work alongside others to learn the material. I plan to apply my newfound knowledge in college, as I take courses in math and technology for Electrical Engineering. I know there will be math I struggle to understand, or a coding language that is more difficult than what I taught myself, but my past experiences show me that I will make it through just fine. I want to grow my knowledge and talents and hope to one day help develop solutions to issues in my community, such as the digital divide.