Learning how to pause by Rahkel

Learning how to pause by Rahkel - August 2026 Scholarship Essay

Over time, two close friends told me that I get angry too quickly. As a passionate friend, I often take my friends' and family's feelings into consideration before my own. I have always felt that when someone I care about is being attacked or hurt, it affects me as well. When I heard this feedback the first time, I was able to brush it off. The second time, however, it made me stop and think. Do I get angry too quickly? Did they expect that reaction from me? If I'm not angry for them, will they question whether I care?

After letting the feedback sit with me, I realized that the way I see myself and the way others perceive me can be completely different. The anger my friends saw was sometimes more than they needed from me. They may have simply wanted to vent, feel heard, or have their emotions validated. I realized that supporting someone does not always mean matching their emotions or immediately sharing my own opinions.

What needed to change was not how I felt or what I believed, but how I chose to respond. I began learning that being passionate about something is not always going to be received in the way I intend, and that is okay. I have become more intentional about recognizing when my perspective is helpful and when someone simply needs me to listen.

This experience has taught me that feedback does not have to change who I am to help me grow. Sometimes, it gives me a different perspective on myself. I am learning to pause before reacting, listen before responding, and understand that there is value in considering how my actions are experienced by others.

As I continue my education and pursue a career in the creative and entertainment industries, I know I will constantly receive feedback on my ideas and work. I want to carry this lesson with me: I can remain passionate about what I believe while still being willing to pause, listen, and grow.