Be present. by Maliyha

Be present. by Maliyha - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

Understand that presence isn’t a guarantee, it’s a gift. Growing up I was what you considered a “Daddy’s girl”. The time we spent together was always enjoyable and peaceful at the same time. We had a quiet kind of connection, a deep understanding to where we didn’t have to say much a majority of the time. We loved going to the mall, not to shop, but to sit side by side in the food court, eating from our favorite Chinese spot, and simply enjoying each other’s presence. At home, our peak moments would be me playing dress up in his work clothes or us watching “The Bernie Mac Show”, laughing at Bernie’s dramatic reactions and chaotic household. These moments in my life shaped most of my childhood, but unfortunately at the age of 13 I lost my dad.
Can you imagine what it feels like to grieve someone who’s still walking this earth? It’s strange, missing how involved they were, the laughs you guys shared, missing the version of themselves that showed that they cared about you. That version feels like a distant memory, like maybe it never happened and I imagined it all on my own. He started to check in on me less and less, rarely attending my big accomplishments. I don’t know If life suddenly got too heavy for him or maybe we changed in ways that weren’t expected, but our bond shifted and less effort was put into our relationship. As I matured I had to realize that people and relationships do change, and to accept people for who they are. Although I never expected this kind of change from someone I valued, I learned that presence isn’t something that is promised to you, it’s a gift. I’m grateful that I cherished those precious moments that I had with my dad, and was present with who I loved.