Embarrassment isn't real by Kathryn

Embarrassment isn't real by Kathryn - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

There are many things I would say to my past self, like taking the ACT earlier or letting go of that one friend. However, the one piece of advice I would give to my past self is the idea that embarrassment is only real if you make it real.

I spent the majority of my life being anxious about what people thought of me. In 5th grade it was embarrassing to not have the cool shoes or have hair on your legs. In 6th grade, it was embarrassing to wear anything but skinny jeans and leggings. In 7th grade, it was embarrassing to be seen in skinny jeans and have any imperfections on your face. In 8th grade, it was embarrassing to have a side part and be caught without makeup on. Freshman year it was embarrassing to sweat in gym class and not have the "perfect" body. The stress I put on myself to follow other people's changing ideals and criticizing opinions left me drained and led me to live an unenjoyable life.

This all changed when I went into my sophomore year of high school, when I discovered how much this fear held me back from embracing my true potential and becoming the best version of myself. I discovered it is not embarrassing to try hard at school or be kind to people, just to be kind to them. It is not embarrassing to wear the outfit you want just because it isn't what people normally wear. It is not embarrassing to put yourself out there because if you get rejected you can move on. It is not embarrassing to be successful, and you should own your accomplishments, not hide them.

These new ideals let me live my life every day to the fullest without the ever-changing pressures of fitting into the impossible mold society claims as ideal. I wish I could go back in time to share this with the girl I once was, but since that is impossible, I exclaim this revelation to every insecure and embarrassed young girl I encounter, hoping they can hold fast to these ideas as they are attacked by the pressures of this world.