To Love, To Live, To Lose by Julianna

To Love, To Live, To Lose by Julianna - October 2025 Scholarship Essay

Books provide readers with a unique gift nothing else can replicate. They offer an escape from reality and allow us to use our imaginations freely. Everyone has a sacred book that changes their view on life, and for me it is The Fault in Our Stars by John Green. From the cover it appears to be a sweet romance, but as you flip each page, your perspective on life is changed forever. The novel is written from Hazel Grace’s perspective, a sixteen-year-old girl living with terminal thyroid cancer that has spread to her lungs. However, her character is not defined by her illness, but rather her intellect, optimistic, and hopeful view on life.
The novel begins with Hazel describing that she is reluctant to form relationships with others. Why form attachments when you are a ticking time bomb, just waiting to die? She compares herself to a grenade, constantly warning others that she will inevitably “blow up” and hurt everyone she has ever come to love. However, when she meets Augustus Waters in a cancer support group that her mom forced her to attend, the course of her life changes.
Augustus, an osteosarcoma survivor, challenges Hazel’s perspective on life, and most importantly, love. His confident and bold personality fascinates her. Unlike Hazel, who isolates herself from others because she fears her death will hurt them, Augustus is eager to live a life that is remembered. Their contrasting personalities and beliefs shape the central theme of the novel.
Although Hazel strictly believed in not forming any relationships, Augustus makes her reconsider. Their relationship begins to deepen; it all comes so natural for the both of them. Hazel recognizes that while love does not lessen the pain associated with loss, it brings joy and allows her to truly live. By sharing books, goals, and fears with Augustus, she realizes that she is falling for him. She soon learns that intimacy and vulnerability does not make her weak or selfish. Instead, they allow love to flourish and show that without love, life is incomplete.
However, all these lessons do not compare to what I learned during the pivotal change in trajectory. When Augustus’s cancer returns unexpectedly, his body begins to quickly deteriorate. Hazel does not sugar coat anything, making it feel like you are there with her experiencing it. However, despite her fear of experiencing grief, Hazel stays by his side. She learns to cherish every moment, and that life is too short to waste it worrying about death. Unfortunately, Augustus passes away. Rather than focusing on the unbearable pain of losing the love of her life, Hazel reflects on the beauty and privilege of knowing and loving him. This showcases that even during times of grief, you can still be grateful for having the opportunity of loving someone.
One of the most impactful quotes throughout the book that stuck with me is “You gave me forever within the numbered days, and for that I am eternally grateful.” It reminded me that life is not measured by years, but by meaningful moments. Someone can change your life in a very short amount of time, especially when you least expect it. Even though Hazel and Augustus did not have years to grow old together, the everlasting love and understanding they shared in their short love story was eternal in its own way.
Hazel’s journey taught me that suffering and grief is inescapable. It is the price we pay for loving others, yet it does not define our love for them. We cannot choose the cards we are dealt in life, but we do get to choose how we play them. Hazel’s ability to reciprocate love, even when she was afraid of causing heartbreak to others, showed me that avoiding grief is only stopping someone from living life to the fullest. Life is too short to not take chances, because without taking risks you will never live your life to the absolute fullest. Life's fragility is not a reason to isolate yourself and shut down, but it is a reason to let your walls down and connect with others on a deeper level.
In a world where we are constantly pressured to be successful, rich, and make our lives seem impressive to societal standards, Hazel calls us to slow down and live in the moment. It is acceptable to live a small, quiet life that is filled with love, happiness, and true meaning. She helped me see that our worth is not defined by how loudly we live, but rather by how honestly we do.
Overall, Hazel Grace Lancaster is so much more than a fictional character in a novel. Instead, she is a quiet, yet powerful voice of compassion, resilience, honesty, and most importantly, love. Thanks to her, I learned that no matter how short life is, there is still beauty everywhere. Life is a gift, and it is important to not waste it worrying about tomorrow, because tomorrow is not promised. Live every day to the fullest, and most importantly, like it is your last.