Staring at The Mirror by Chloe

Staring at The Mirror by Chloe - May 2026 Scholarship Essay

“Math, math, math,” then I went off to my next word “snakes, snakes, snakes.” I was standing in front of a mirror; I trembled and gasped between each word. With every mispronounced syllable, I felt as though my teeth were falling out of my gums into the drain of my bathroom sink. I saw the slight tears in my eyes which welled with frustration, but I knew I had to continue.

My severe speech impediment made communicating with others borderline impossible. Each off-handed comment or stifled laugh I received made me ache inside. I knew I had big ideas and thoughts to share, but I boxed them up to avoid criticism and embarrassment.

During this time of isolation, I felt truly understood by my grandparents, Mima and Papi, who raised me for the first years of my life and whose words of encouragement soothed my frustration. Having immigrated to New York City from Port-Au-Prince, Haiti, they told me how people would call them “monkey” or laugh at their thick accents. I resonated with their stories, especially how I was underestimated by my teachers and ridiculed by my peers due to my speech impediment.

Whenever I felt down, they would lift my chin up and tell me stories about how they courageously built their lives and chased their dreams despite the hurtful treatment they sometimes received. Importantly, they never undermined my big ambitions, even when I said I wanted to join the House of Representatives when I was older. They reassured me that my voice wasn’t a joke — it held the power to move mountains. So that day, when I stood practicing in front of the mirror, I wiped my tears and felt their words echo in my head. I could feel my power growing.

As the weeks passed, I noticed that my thoughts and ideas were starting to make their way out. Though I occasionally stumbled, it phased me less and less everyday. I’d take a deep breath and continue my sentence, even if I messed up. The fear of becoming tongue-tied shrank with each classroom remark, successful presentation, and interaction with new friends. This added a fresh dimension to learning, especially in history class, where we could debate and discuss current events. It was here that my big thoughts leapt from my chest with a clarity that surprised even me.

I could feel my momentum and courage growing day-by-day. Despite feeling anxious, I earned a spot on student council my freshman year after talking to my peers about their grievances and suggestions for events and school spirit. By conversing with my classmates, I began to realize I wasn’t alone in my struggles to find my voice. This fueled me forward even more. Wanting to challenge myself and become more involved in my community, I started attending Chicago town hall meetings where I found out about the All Stars Project (ASP), which gives teenagers from underrepresented communities a place to learn about professional spaces, and mentorship from a support group of caring adults. The first event was networking with different Chicago professionals, and just the thought of it made me nervous. I finally arrived at the event and I immediately wanted to leave, but I was suddenly told these ridiculous instructions. In front of the group we each had to count to three, but with each round the numbers were substituted by different sounds or dance moves. Whenever we messed up we’d have to scream: “I made a mistake!” and everyone would clap. Exercises like these have given tremendous growth to my self-confidence and my ability to take advantage of opportunities that used to scare me.

Nowadays when I look in the mirror, I don't see a tongue-tied eleven year old. I see someone who is able to voice her own opinion, and able to freely communicate her ideas. I see someone Mima and Papi would be proud of.