Asking for Help Is Not Weakness by alianah

Asking for Help Is Not Weakness by alianah - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

If I could give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: you are allowed to ask for help, and doing so does not make you weak. For most of my life, I believed that independence meant handling everything on my own. I saw asking for help as something people did when they gave up and I never wanted to be seen that way. I wanted to be strong. I wanted to be capable. I wanted to prove to myself and to others that I could succeed no matter what was put in front of me. That belief pushed me forward but it also isolated me.
When I started college, I was doing it completely on my own. No one guided me through applications, no one helped me understand financial aid, and no one gave me advice on what to expect. I figured everything out alone because I felt like I had to. I worked, I studied, I struggled silently. Even when things felt like they were falling apart, I convinced myself that I had to keep going without showing weakness. I did not want anyone to think I did not belong or that I could not handle the pressure.
Looking back, I wish I could tell that version of myself that asking for help is not a failure. It is a form of strength. It takes courage to admit you are struggling. It takes maturity to say, “I do not know how to do this, and I need guidance.” Whether it is asking a professor a question, going to office hours, seeking counseling, or applying for scholarships, reaching out for support opens doors. It does not close them.
Once I finally began to lean on others; mentors, advisors, classmates, I saw a shift. My stress became manageable. My opportunities expanded. My confidence grew not because I had everything figured out but because I no longer felt like I had to carry everything by myself. I found community, I found resources, and I found new ways to move forward with clarity and hope.
If I had known earlier that I did not have to prove myself by suffering alone, I could have given myself so much more peace. I would have trusted others sooner. I would have advocated for myself with less fear. I would have spent less time being scared of failure and more time growing through the process.
I would tell my past self that strength is not measured by how quiet your struggles are but by how willing you are to confront them head on. You do not have to be the strongest person in every room. You just have to be honest about where you are and brave enough to ask for what you need to keep going.
Learning this lesson changed the way I live. It has shaped how I plan to work with others in the future especially in healthcare and public service. I want to be someone who encourages people to speak up, to ask for help, and to believe that they are not alone. If I can help others reach that understanding sooner than I did, then all of the challenges I faced will have been worth it.