What I Didn't Understand Changed Everything by Abbey

What I Didn't Understand Changed Everything by Abbey - February 2026 Scholarship Essay

For me, academic success has always been something I expected of myself. Falling below my standards was never an option, and for years, that mindset worked. I was the kind of student who relied on consistency and discipline, believing that effort would always lead directly to understanding. Then sophomore year arrived, and with it came a heavier course load and classes that challenged me in ways I wasn’t prepared for. For the first time in my academic career, I was confused. Unfortunately, I didn’t understand how to fix what I didn’t automatically comprehend. Instead of seeing confusion as temporary, I viewed it as a sign that I was falling behind. I had always associated success with immediately understanding the material, so when that didn’t happen, I felt stuck. That feeling was frustrating and unfamiliar, and it made me question methods that had once worked so well for me.
Unexpectedly, I saw this girl on TikTok who completely changed my perspective. At first, I didn’t expect a short video on social media to influence the way I approached my schoolwork, but her message stayed with me long after I scrolled past her video. She explained how, after every class or study session, she wrote down one thing she didn’t fully understand, even if she performed well overall. She treated her confusion not as a failure, but as a starting point for her academic growth. Rather than avoiding those gaps in knowledge, she intentionally returned to them. She took what she didn’t understand and reviewed it repeatedly until she understood how all of the pieces fell into place. This idea stayed with me because most students focus only on grades or achievements, while this approach focused on understanding. It emphasized learning as a process rather than a performance. Tracking my confusion, I realized, requires intellectual honesty, curiosity, and a genuine growth mindset. It also requires the willingness to admit that not knowing something is not a weakness, but an opportunity.
I decided to try it out, and it quickly became a game-changer for me. At first, it felt uncomfortable to write down what I didn’t understand, especially when I had done well on an assignment or quiz. Writing down what I didn’t understand helped me to ask more thoughtful questions, study more efficiently, and stop equating my confusion with failure. Instead of rereading material I already knew, I could focus my time on what actually needed improvement. I realized that success wasn’t about avoiding confusion, but learning how to sit with it and solve it. Over time, this habit not only improved my academic performance but also reduced the anxiety I felt around challenging material. Because of this shift, I stopped measuring my success by what I got right and started measuring it by what I didn’t yet understand. As a result, confusion has become one of my most valuable tools rather than something to fear.