Don’t Let Everything Said or Done To You Define Who You Are. by Shania

Don’t Let Everything Said or Done To You Define Who You Are. by Shania - July 2025 Scholarship Essay

If I could give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: “Don’t let everything said or done to you define who you are.” This statement embodies a life lesson that I wish I had internalized much earlier in my journey. My middle school years were incredibly challenging and transformative, primarily due to experiences with bullying and self-image issues. During that time, I was acutely aware of comments made about my appearance. As a young child, I struggled to navigate societal pressures and feelings of inadequacy. I even received a letter from the school nurse in sixth grade informing my parents that I was overweight for my age. This label weighed heavily on me, even though I didn’t fully grasp its implications at that moment. Seventh grade was somewhat manageable, but everything changed in eighth grade when my family faced homelessness. Moving from hotel to hotel while attending school made it difficult to maintain a sense of normalcy. Surrounded by classmates in stylish clothes, I felt out of place and often assumed others were laughing at me. I internalized these feelings, leading to a decline in my self-esteem. The pandemic only exacerbated these issues. Falling behind in school resulted in feelings of worthlessness, prompting me to ask my mom if I could transition to homeschooling. This decision was a turning point. Finally able to focus on my studies and mental health, I began to address my insecurities. I realized the difference between external validation and true self-worth, which allowed me to embrace who I am. I learned to step outside my comfort zone, wearing clothes that expressed my true self rather than fitting into a mold. Through self-reflection and healing, I discovered the importance of self-love and the value of appreciating positivity in life. The difficult experiences I faced taught me resilience and the vital lesson that I am not defined by the opinions of others. If I could travel back in time, I would remind my younger self to embrace authenticity and not let negativity define my worth.
Reflecting on this transformative journey, I realize that it’s crucial not to let other people's opinions shape our self-identity. The strength I developed during those years has become a fundamental part of who I am today. Embracing my true self—flaws and all—has empowered me to stand up against negativity and embrace the beauty of being authentic. The struggles I faced were difficult, but they ultimately led me to a place of acceptance, resilience, and self-love, which I carry with me as I move forward in life.

If I could give one piece of advice to my past self, it would be this: "Don't let everything you've done or told to you define who you are." This is a piece of advice that I wish I had followed much earlier in life. My middle school experience was particularly tough, much of which involved bullying and body issues. When I was growing up, there used to be comments made about my appearance. It was hard as a little kid to reconcile society and feeling inadequate. I even received a note from the school nurse when I was in the sixth grade informing my parents that I was overweight for my age. The word hung heavily on me, even though I did not fully grasp what it meant back then. Seventh grade was better, but eighth grade was altered for my family and me with the looming specter of homelessness. Moving from hotel to hotel while attending school made it difficult to discover some kind of normalcy. While going to school and being surrounded by girls who had nice clothes, I felt self-conscious and thought everyone was laughing at me, with me otherthinking. These thoughts played a role in the demise of my self-esteem. The pandemic did nothing more than accentuate these issues. Falling behind in school caused me to feel worthless, so I looked at my mom and asked to be homeschooled. It was a turning point. At last being able to focus on learning and mental well-being, I was finally able to begin addressing my insecurities. I realized the distinction between external validation and true self-worth, which helped me to love myself. I came to understand how to step out of my comfort zone, wearing clothes that represented who I am and not merely what suited a pattern. Through self-awareness and healing, I understood the value of loving myself and embracing positivity in life. The struggles I encountered taught me about resilience and the important lesson that I am not defined by how others perceive me. If I could go back in time, I would tell my younger self to stay true to who I am and not let negativity determine my worth. Reflecting on this journey, I realize it’s vital not to allow others to dictate our sense of identity. The strength I developed during those years has become an intrinsic part of who I am today. Although the challenges were hard, they guided me toward a place of acceptance, empowerment, and self-love that I carry with me as I continue to navigate through life.