Language Standards: Using Language Variety and Sentence Style for Effect (CCSS.L.5.3)

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Common Core 5th Grade ELA › Language Standards: Using Language Variety and Sentence Style for Effect (CCSS.L.5.3)

Questions 1 - 10
1

I went to the science fair with my class. I worked with a partner on a volcano model. I cut the paper and I taped it to the bottle. I poured in the baking soda. I slowly added the vinegar. I watched it fizz and spill over. I felt nervous about the mess. I cleaned the table fast. I showed the judges our notes. I said we tested it three times. I thought it was fun. I hope we get a ribbon.

Which revision best improves the variety of sentences and flow without changing the meaning?

I went to the science fair with my class. I worked with a partner on a volcano model. I cut paper and taped it to a bottle. I poured in baking soda. I added vinegar. I watched it fizz over. I got nervous about the mess. I cleaned the table. I showed the judges our notes. I told them we tested it three times. I thought it was fun. I hope we get a ribbon.

At the science fair, my partner and I built a paper volcano around a bottle. After pouring in baking soda, I slowly added vinegar and watched foam spill over the tray. Although the mess made me nervous, we cleaned quickly. Then we showed the judges our notes, explaining that we had tested the model three times. In the end, the project was fun, and I hoped for a ribbon.

Then I went to the science fair with my class. Then I worked with a partner on a volcano model. Then I cut paper and taped it to a bottle. Also, I poured in baking soda and also added vinegar. Then it fizzed over, then I felt nervous. Also, I cleaned the table. Then I showed the judges our notes and then said we tested it three times. Also, I thought it was fun and then hoped for a ribbon.

Attending the science exposition with my classmates, I constructed a volcanic apparatus. Subsequently, sodium bicarbonate was introduced, followed by acetic acid, producing effervescence. Concerned about potential spillage, remediation occurred promptly. Documentation was presented to adjudicators, indicating three trials. The experience was satisfactory, and a commendation was anticipated.

Explanation

Choice B varies sentence openings, combines short ideas smoothly, and keeps the same meaning. The other options are either repetitive, overly formulaic, or too formal for the context.

2

Our class visited the history museum, and the guide explained the exhibits in a serious way. I took notes because this report is supposed to sound professional. But the dinosaur skeleton was totally awesome, and I was like, wow. The ancient tools were neat, too, and the lighting was pretty cool. I guess I should mention the timeline display, which was kind of confusing, but whatever, it was fine. I will now conclude by saying the trip was informative and also super fun.

Which option best keeps the tone consistently formal for a school report without changing the meaning?

Our class visited the history museum, and the guide explained stuff in a serious way. I took notes because this report has to sound professional, but the dinosaur skeleton was totally awesome, like wow. The tools were pretty cool, and the timeline was kind of confusing, but whatever. The trip was super fun and informative.

Our class visited the history museum; the guide elucidated the exhibits with admirable rigor. Notes were taken to maintain a suitably professional tenor. The dinosaur skeleton proved estimable, and the ancient tools merited approbation. Illumination contributed to the displays. The timeline display occasioned minor perplexity. I hereby conclude that the excursion was both instructive and pleasurable.

Our class visited the history museum, where the guide explained the exhibits. I took notes to make it sound professional. The dinosaur skeleton was pretty cool and the ancient tools were neat. The lighting was cool. The timeline was kind of confusing. In conclusion, the trip was informative and fun.

Our class visited the history museum, where the guide explained the exhibits clearly. I took notes because the report should sound professional. The dinosaur skeleton was impressive, and the ancient tools were interesting. The lighting enhanced the displays. I should also mention the timeline exhibit, which was somewhat confusing, but overall it was fine. In conclusion, the trip was informative and enjoyable.

Explanation

Choice D maintains a clear, formal tone with precise but accessible wording. A and C include casual language, and B is overly ornate and awkward for a school report.

3

I joined the community garden last spring. I wanted to learn how to grow vegetables. I picked a small plot near the fence. I planted tomatoes. I planted carrots. I planted beans. I watered the plants every morning. I pulled weeds after school. I kept a notebook. I wrote down when the seedlings sprouted. I measured the plants each week. I asked neighbors for tips. I brought home the first ripe tomato. I shared it with my family. It tasted sweet.

Which revision best combines sentences to reduce choppiness while keeping the original meaning?

Last spring I joined the community garden to learn how to grow vegetables. I chose a small plot near the fence and planted tomatoes, carrots, and beans. Every morning I watered the plants, and after school I pulled weeds. I kept a notebook to record when seedlings sprouted and measured their growth each week. With tips from neighbors, I brought home the first ripe tomato and shared the sweet taste with my family.

I joined the community garden last spring. I wanted to learn to grow vegetables. I picked a small plot near the fence. I planted tomatoes, carrots, and beans. I watered every morning. I pulled weeds after school. I kept a notebook. I wrote down when seedlings sprouted. I measured the plants each week. I asked neighbors for tips. I brought home a ripe tomato. I shared it with my family. It tasted sweet.

Last spring I joined the community garden and I wanted to learn to grow vegetables and I picked a small plot near the fence and planted tomatoes and carrots and beans and I watered every morning and pulled weeds after school and I kept a notebook and wrote down when seedlings sprouted and measured plants each week and I asked neighbors for tips and I brought home the first ripe tomato and shared it with my family and it tasted sweet.

In the vernal season, I commenced participation in a community horticultural initiative; thereafter, numerous botanical tasks were undertaken, culminating in the acquisition of an agreeable tomato that was subsequently apportioned among kin.

Explanation

Choice A thoughtfully combines related ideas, varies structure, and preserves meaning. B remains choppy, C strings too many ideas with repetitive connectors, and D shifts into an overly formal, vague tone.

4

In our school play rehearsal, I was responsible for timing the scene changes, which is a task that requires focus, but my friend Jay was like, 'No worries, we got this,' and I was all, yeah, sure. I carefully noted each cue in the stage book, and then Jay goes, 'We can just wing it, it's chill.' I want to maintain a professional vibe; however, I also kinda want to relax like Jay. It was fine, I guess, because the transitions mostly worked.

Which revision best keeps the narrator's voice formal while preserving Jay's casual speech, so the contrast in register is clear?

During rehearsal for our school play, I was responsible for timing the scene changes, a task requiring focus. Jay said, 'Do not worry, we have this under control,' and I answered, 'Yes, certainly.' I carefully recorded each cue in the stage book and said we should proceed as planned. When Jay added, 'We can simply improvise,' I aimed to maintain professionalism. In the end, the transitions mostly worked.

At play practice, I was in charge of timing stuff, which is kinda hard, and Jay was like, 'No worries, we got this,' and I was like, 'yeah, sure.' I wrote down cues, and Jay goes, 'We can just wing it, it's chill.' I wanna keep it pro, but I also wanna relax. It was fine since the transitions mostly worked.

During rehearsal for our school play, I was responsible for timing the scene changes, a task that required focus. Jay said, 'No worries, we got this,' and I replied, 'Sure.' I carefully recorded each cue in the stage book. When Jay added, 'We can just wing it, it's chill,' I wanted to remain professional, even though relaxing sounded appealing. In the end, the transitions mostly worked.

During rehearsal, I had to time scene changes; however, I was kinda thinking it would be okay to chill because Jay said, 'No worries, we got this.' I noted each cue, and then Jay goes, 'We can just wing it.' I intend to be professional, but it was fine because the transitions mostly worked.

Explanation

Choice C maintains a formal narrative voice while keeping Jay's dialogue informal, clearly contrasting registers without changing meaning. The other choices make both voices formal, both casual, or mix tones awkwardly.

5

I went to the museum with my class. I walked through the tall doors. I saw a dinosaur skeleton. I read the little sign. I did not understand everything. I asked the guide a question. I listened to the answer. I wrote notes in my journal. I felt excited. I got hungry at noon. I ate a sandwich. I wanted to see the space room. I hurried there with my friend. I looked up at the model planets. I thought the trip was interesting and cool and stuff.

Which revision best improves the variety of sentences and keeps the tone consistent without changing the meaning?

I went to the museum with my class, and I walked through the tall doors. I saw a dinosaur skeleton, and I read the little sign. I did not understand everything, and I asked the guide a question. I listened to the answer, and I wrote notes. I felt excited. At noon I ate a sandwich. I wanted the space room and hurried there. I looked up at the model planets. I thought the trip was interesting.

I went to the museum. I went through tall doors. I saw a dinosaur. I read a sign. I did not understand. I asked a guide. I listened. I wrote notes. I was excited. I got hungry. I ate. I wanted the space room. I hurried there. I looked up at planets. I thought the trip was cool.

During our class trip to the museum, I stepped through the tall doors and paused at a towering dinosaur skeleton. Although I didn't understand every detail on the sign, the guide's answer to my question helped, so I noted it in my journal. By noon I grabbed a sandwich, then hurried to the space room with a friend. Gazing at the model planets, I realized the trip was both interesting and worthwhile.

On our class museum trip, I walked in and, not gonna lie, the dino skeleton was super cool. I didn't get the sign much, so I hit up the guide and jotted stuff down. Then I grabbed a sandwich and rushed to the space room with my friend. Those planets were kinda epic.

Explanation

Choice C combines short sentences, varies openings, and keeps a consistent, appropriate tone while preserving meaning. A and B remain repetitive or choppy, and D shifts to informal slang.

6

Our group conducted an experiment to see how light affects plant growth. We followed a detailed procedure and recorded observations each day. But, honestly, the plants were kind of moody, which was funny. The data table included height measurements and leaf color changes. We were like, wow, the shaded plants were not happy. The conclusion states that plants in brighter light grew taller and kept greener leaves. Overall, this study demonstrates significant results, and it was pretty awesome to watch the sprouts do their thing.

Which option best keeps the tone consistent and appropriately formal for a school report without changing the meaning?

Our group conducted an experiment to examine how light affects plant growth. We followed a detailed procedure and recorded observations each day. Although some results were surprising, the data table shows changes in height and leaf color. The conclusion states that plants in brighter light grew taller and kept greener leaves. Overall, the study produced clear results, and observing the sprouts throughout the process was informative.

Our group did an experiment to see how light affects plant growth, and it was pretty awesome. We followed a procedure and wrote things down each day. We were like, wow, the shaded plants were not happy, so the conclusion says the bright ones did better. This study shows big results.

If you follow a detailed procedure each day, you can totally see how light affects plants. Your data table will include height and color changes, and you'll probably be like, wow, the shaded ones aren't happy. The conclusion is that bright light helps.

An experiment concerning the effect of light on plant growth was performed by our group. Daily observations were recorded. Amusement occurred due to plant mood variation. A data table contained measurements of height and leaf color. A conclusion regarding brighter light and greener leaves was produced. Overall observation was satisfactory.

Explanation

Choice A removes slang and keeps a consistent, formal tone while preserving the original meaning. B and C include informal expressions, and D is overly stiff and awkward, reducing clarity.

7

We started baking cookies after school. We washed our hands. We read the recipe. We got the ingredients from the pantry. We wanted chocolate chips, and we wanted walnuts, and we wanted raisins, too. We mixed everything. We dropped spoonfuls on the tray. We put the tray in the oven. We waited by the window. We smelled the cookies. We set out plates. We took the tray out carefully. We let the cookies cool. We tasted the first batch. We agreed the cookies were good.

Which revision best combines sentences to improve flow and reduce repetition without changing the meaning?

We started baking cookies after school, and we washed our hands, and we read the recipe, and we got the ingredients, and we mixed everything, and we dropped spoonfuls, and we put the tray in, and we waited, and we smelled the cookies, and we set out plates, and we took the tray out, and we let them cool, and we tasted them. We agreed the cookies were good.

After school we got to baking—boom. We washed up, grabbed stuff from the pantry, and tossed in chips, walnuts, and raisins because why not. We chucked spoonfuls on a tray and popped it in. We hung out, sniffed the air, and then yo, first batch slapped. Good cookies.

After school, cookies were baked by us. Our hands were washed and the recipe was read. Ingredients were obtained from the pantry: chocolate chips, walnuts, and raisins. Everything was mixed and spoonfuls were placed on the tray. The tray was put into the oven, and we waited by the window. The cookies were smelled, the plates were set, the tray was removed, the cookies were cooled, and the first batch was tasted. The cookies were declared good.

After school, we washed our hands, read the recipe, and gathered chocolate chips, walnuts, and raisins from the pantry. Then we mixed the dough, dropped spoonfuls onto a tray, and slid it into the oven. While we waited by the window, the smell filled the room. At last we set out plates, took the tray out carefully, let the cookies cool, and tasted the first batch. We all agreed they were good.

Explanation

Choice D combines related actions, uses transitions, and avoids repetitive beginnings while keeping the same events and meaning. A is a long chain of ands, B is too informal, and C is grammatically correct but overly passive and awkward.

8

In the story, the narrator uses standard English to describe the town. But the characters talk in a local dialect that drops some endings. This shows culture, which is neat. The formal narration sounds smooth and careful. The dialogue sounds relaxed and homey, and it sometimes changes verbs. The text, therefore, reflects sociolinguistic variation, which is kind of cool, I guess. The differences help readers hear how people speak. The contrast also sets the narrator apart from the characters, like for real.

Which option best keeps the tone consistent and clearly compares the varieties of English used in the story?

The narrator uses standard English. The characters use dialect. The narration is formal. The dialogue is relaxed. This shows culture. The differences help readers. The contrast sets the narrator apart.

In the story, the narrator uses standard English to describe the town, while several characters speak in a local dialect that drops some endings and alters verb forms. The formal narration sounds careful and precise, whereas the dialogue sounds relaxed and conversational. Together, these differences highlight local culture and help readers hear how people actually speak. The contrast also separates the narrator's voice from the characters' voices.

The narrator talks fancy, but the characters drop endings and stuff, which is kind of cool. The narration is careful, and the dialogue is chill. So, yeah, you can totally hear how people talk, and the narrator is, like, separate from the others.

The utilization of standard English by the narrator juxtaposed with the deployment of localized dialect by characters results in the manifestation of cultural signaling; this is neat. Consequently, reader perception of speech patterns occurs, and narrator-character differentiation is achieved in an effective manner.

Explanation

Choice B maintains an academic, consistent tone and clearly contrasts the narrator's standard English with the characters' dialect. A is too choppy, C is informal, and D is wordy and inconsistent.

9

We went on a class trip to the natural history museum. We walked through the dinosaur hall. We saw fossils. We learned about ancient animals. The guide spoke quickly and we were like, wow. The rooms were big. We read notes on the walls. We took pictures. We were tired. Then we ate lunch. Then we got on the bus. The trip was nice. It was totally awesome but also extremely educational, therefore we felt good about it.

Which revision best improves the variety of sentences while keeping the same meaning?

We went on a class trip to the natural history museum. We walked through the dinosaur hall and we saw fossils. We learned about ancient animals. We were like, wow, the guide spoke quickly. We read the notes. We took pictures. We were tired. Then we ate lunch. Then we got on the bus. The trip was awesome and educational.

The excursion to the natural history museum constituted an observation of fossils and an acquisition of information about ancient animals. The guide's rapid discourse elicited astonishment. The rooms were of considerable size. The notes on the walls were read. Photographs were taken. Lunch was consumed prior to boarding the bus. The experience was simultaneously enjoyable and instructive.

On our class trip to the natural history museum, we walked through the dinosaur hall and studied fossils to learn about ancient animals. Although the guide spoke quickly, the exhibits impressed us. The rooms were spacious, and we read the wall notes and took pictures. After a busy morning, we ate lunch, returned to the bus, and felt good about a trip that was both enjoyable and educational.

During our trip we walked through the dinosaur hall, and then we saw fossils, and then we learned about ancient animals, and then we ate lunch, and then we got on the bus, and it was awesome and also educational.

Explanation

Choice C varies sentence openings, combines related ideas, and removes slang to keep a clear, consistent tone. A is repetitive and informal, B is overly stiff and wordy, and D is a long, awkward chain of 'and then' clauses.

10

I am writing about making cookies for the school fundraiser. First, we mixed the dough. Then we put in chocolate chips. The oven was hot. We slapped those trays in, and boom, the smell was epic. However, an individual must monitor bake time for optimal results. Then we bagged the cookies. We slapped stickers on the bags, which was chill. The cookies sold fast. This report will explicate our process, kind of. We cleaned up, too. It was a thing.

Which option best keeps the tone consistent for a school report?

This report describes how our team made cookies for the school fundraiser. First, we mixed the dough and added chocolate chips. With the oven preheated, we placed the trays inside and noticed the warm smell. However, we monitored the bake time carefully for the best results. Afterward, we bagged the cookies, added stickers, cleaned up, and sold them quickly.

I'm gonna tell you how we made cookies for the fundraiser. We mixed dough, tossed in chips, shoved trays in, and boom, the smell was epic. You gotta watch the time, though. We bagged them, slapped on stickers, cleaned up, and the cookies sold super fast.

This report explains making cookies. We mixed the dough and, wow, the oven smell was epic. However, one must watch the bake time. Then we bagged the cookies and slapped on stickers, which was chill.

The process is described herein. The process involved mixing dough and the addition of chocolate chips. The process continued with tray insertion and olfactory results. The process required bake-time monitoring. The process concluded with bagging, labeling, and sales.

Explanation

Choice A uses a consistent, appropriate academic tone with varied sentence structure. B is too informal, C mixes formal and slang, and D is overly repetitive and stiff, making it awkward for a school report.

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