Composition: Developing Drafts with Depth, Facts, and Specific Details (TEKS.ELA.7.10.B.ii)
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Texas 7th Grade ELA › Composition: Developing Drafts with Depth, Facts, and Specific Details (TEKS.ELA.7.10.B.ii)
The State Fair of Texas is a big event that many people in Dallas look forward to each fall. I went with my cousins last year. We walked through the gates and saw rides, games, and food everywhere. The fair felt exciting and a little overwhelming. We tried a few snacks and watched a show. I noticed how the fair brings different people together. There were contests and exhibits, and we visited some of them. By the end of the night, my feet hurt, but I felt happy. The fair seemed special for reasons I want to explain more soon.
Which revision best develops the ideas by adding specific, relevant details and examples?
Some rides reminded me of theme parks in other states, especially a giant coaster I saw online.
There were many foods to choose from, and the shows were nice to watch.
We shared a hot corny dog and powdered fried dough, waved up at the huge cowboy statue, and stood shoulder to shoulder at the livestock ring while a student grinned beside her prize-winning heifer.
We walked a lot and saw rides, games, and exhibits all around us.
Explanation
Choice C adds vivid, specific details (foods, statue, livestock scene) that clarify what made the fair feel special and brings the main ideas to life. The other options are either vague, off-topic, or repeat what the draft already says.
Starting a school garden sounds simple, but it takes planning. Our class decided to grow vegetables behind the gym. First, we picked a sunny spot and cleared the weeds. Then we made a list of what we needed. We also talked about watering and taking turns. Some students wanted flowers, and others wanted herbs. We agreed to start small and see how it went. On the first day, we felt excited to begin. We hoped the garden would teach us responsibility and teamwork. There were still questions about timing and supplies that we needed to answer before planting and budgeting.
Which revision best develops the ideas by adding specific, relevant details and examples?
Before planting, we mixed compost into the top six inches of soil, measured rows twelve inches apart with string, and set up a chart so two students water every morning and check moisture with a finger test.
Gardens have been important since ancient times, and people in many countries grow food.
We made a list and talked about what we needed for the garden.
We should get supplies and make sure we have a plan.
Explanation
Choice A offers concrete steps (soil depth, row spacing, watering plan) that directly support the draft's purpose of planning the garden. The other choices are either unrelated history, too general, or simply repeat the draft.
Our town needs a safe place for teens to skate. Right now, skaters ride in parking lots and on sidewalks. This bothers some shoppers and can be unsafe. A public skate park would give us a place to practice without getting in the way. It could also bring families together. I have seen parks in other towns that look fun. Some people worry about cost and noise. I think there are ways to solve those problems. If we work with the city, we can find a plan that fits our community and makes space for everyone to skate and gather.
Which revision best develops the ideas by adding specific, relevant details and examples?
We can raise money and ask people to help.
Skateboarding became popular in the 1970s and has contests on TV.
A skate park would be a place for skating instead of sidewalks.
Place the park by the rec center, use sound-dampening surfaces near homes, set posted hours, and partner with local shops for a small grant and volunteer cleanups so maintenance costs stay low.
Explanation
Choice D gives concrete solutions (location, noise reduction, hours, partnerships) that address concerns from the draft and strengthen the argument. The other choices are either too general, off-topic history, or restate the original idea.
Last summer, my family went tubing on the San Marcos River. We rented tubes and stepped into the cold water. The river moved us gently at first. Trees leaned over the banks and made shade. I heard laughter from other groups. I felt nervous about the small rapids ahead. We floated past turtles and rocks. Sometimes the tubes bumped together. I wanted to explain why the river felt different from a pool. It seemed peaceful but alive. When we reached the end, we were tired and sun-warmed, and I was already thinking about going back another day with friends too.
Which revision best develops the ideas by adding specific, relevant details and examples?
We floated past rocks and laughed with other groups on the river.
Cold water slid around my ankles like melted ice, minnows flashed over the pale limestone, and cicadas buzzed in the trees as our tubes shot through a narrow chute and spun before the calm returned.
Rivers in other states can be very long and sometimes have dams that make power.
The river was really beautiful and fun to visit.
Explanation
Choice B adds concrete sensory details (temperature, sights, sounds, and a specific moment on the chute) that deepen the description and help readers feel the experience. The other choices are vague, repetitive, or irrelevant.
The San Antonio River Walk felt lively when my family visited last spring. We followed the curving path beside the water and noticed boats sliding by. Restaurants lined the way, and music drifted from somewhere ahead. We paused at a shaded bench and watched people pass, each going somewhere different. I kept looking at the bridges because they looked old and interesting. Sometimes a breeze moved the leaves, and the air seemed cooler near the river. We took pictures and kept walking until evening. The place stayed busy, and lights began to glow. I left thinking I would return again.
Which revision best develops the ideas with relevant, specific details, examples, or explanations?
There were many sights and sounds that made the place nice, and we enjoyed everything we saw.
A mariachi trio strummed on a nearby patio, and the smell of sizzling fajitas drifted across the water. Cypress roots curled into the river, and tile mosaics on the stone bridges shone under string lights. A guide on a barge pointed out where the path loops back toward the historic theater.
I also remembered the long car ride and how my phone battery went low, which was annoying.
We kept walking, took more pictures, and looked at more bridges as we continued along the path.
Explanation
Choice B adds concrete, sensory details (music, scents, cypress roots, tile bridges, barge guide) that clarify what made the River Walk lively. A is too general, C is irrelevant to the main description, and D repeats information without deepening it.
Making breakfast tacos is something my family does on weekends. We gather in the kitchen and get things ready. Someone warms the tortillas while someone else prepares the filling. We talk while we work, and it makes the morning feel relaxed. When everything is cooked, we put the food on the table and make our tacos the way we like them. Sometimes we add a sauce, and sometimes we don't. Eating together starts our day in a good way. It isn't hard to do, and the steps are easy to learn. Anyone can help, and the results taste satisfying together.
Which revision best develops the ideas with relevant, specific details, examples, or explanations?
Use ingredients and cook them until they are ready, then put everything together and enjoy.
Sometimes our dog waits by the door because he likes to see who comes over, and he chases his tail.
We all help, talk together, and make our tacos the way we like them as a family.
Set out flour or corn tortillas, scramble eggs with a pinch of salt, and warm the tortillas on a dry pan until they puff. Add crispy potatoes or refried beans, sprinkle cheese, and spoon on salsa. Wrap the tortilla so nothing spills and eat while it's warm.
Explanation
Choice D adds step-by-step specifics (ingredients, techniques, sequence) that explain the process clearly. A is too vague, B is interesting but irrelevant, and C repeats ideas already in the draft without adding detail.
Our school should start a recycling program to help the environment and our campus. Right now, many bottles and papers go in the trash. If we recycle, we can reduce waste and set a good example. It would also make students think more about their choices. We could place containers in useful spots and encourage everyone to use them. Teachers and students could work together to get it started. There are ways to make it simple and effective. With a little effort, our school could make a difference. It's a plan that could succeed if we follow through on it.
Which revision best develops the ideas with relevant, specific details, examples, or explanations?
Start with three clearly labeled bins in the cafeteria and by main hallway doors—one for bottles, one for paper, one for cans. A student Green Team can collect them every Friday and weigh the bags to track progress. Post results on morning announcements and ask the city's recycling service to pick up weekly.
We should make a plan, tell people about it, and try our best to keep it going.
Recycling helps the environment and sets a good example for everyone at school.
We could also update the gym scoreboard and repaint the bleachers to make school spirit stronger.
Explanation
Choice A provides concrete actions, locations, roles, and a way to measure results, which strengthens the proposal. B is too general, C repeats the thesis, and D is off-topic.
Our class visited a science museum last month, and the day felt exciting from the start. We rode the bus, checked in with our chaperones, and entered the main hall. Exhibits stood in every direction, and there was a lot to see. We split into groups and moved through the floor. Some exhibits invited us to interact, and others were displays to look at. Time passed quickly as we explored. Before leaving, we stopped by the gift shop and then returned to school. The trip made science feel more real, and I thought about it afterward during the ride home.
Which revision best develops the ideas with relevant, specific details, examples, or explanations?
We walked through many exhibits in groups and looked at the displays along the way.
The gift shop had lots of toys, and I thought about buying a big poster for my room.
Our group built a mini tornado in a clear tube, touched a heavy iron meteorite, and made a bulb light by turning a hand crank in the electricity lab. In the planetarium, the guide dimmed the lights and traced how the Big Dipper points to the North Star.
There were many cool science experiments and interesting facts everywhere you looked.
Explanation
Choice C adds specific exhibit names and hands-on actions that show what made the trip engaging and meaningful. A and D are too general, and B is irrelevant to the learning focus.